River Island June 2015

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I confess I haven’t bought anything from River Island since I was about 15 (I remember we all wanted the vintage collage carrier bag for our PE kit!); I find it similar to walking into Topshop, wondering if I will be asked for I.D and then told to leave because I’m too old. I ordered online just to be on the safe side.

Several of these items were available in other colours and patterns.

Orange animal print maxi dress,   

Verdict: Crossover pleated bodice and elasticated waistband really flatter a flat chest. There is some midriff on show but not as much as I thought there would be (you could layer a contrast vest underneath if you wanted to).

White mesh textured crepe swing dress,


Verdict: The perfect optical illusion dress? The contrast black and white sections fall perfectly across the bust, inline with the sleeves to create width. The addition of the scooped mesh neckline adds shape.

The swing shape of this dress means it’s really flattering over tummies and hips.

*Rubbish photo alert!*

Verdict: Integral navy slip underneath creates the illusion of shape and the chiffon layer hangs nicely.

Yellow floral print waisted maxi dress,

Verdict: Gathered halterneck falls beautifully into elasticated waistband. The cut under my arms was generous enough to hide my scars.

Dark red waisted drape dress,


Verdict: I love these dresses with the pleating gathered over the tummy! This one is not for the faint hearted thought as it fits where it touches and the armholes are quite low; you can clearly see my scars on the side view.

Black printed shirt dress,

(Stripes and the profile reflection haven’t worked very well here, sorry!)  

Verdict: Great shirt dress for uniboobers thanks to the assymetrical pattern. This dress has darts, but due to the light fabric it still hangs well.

Blue geometric print sleeveless shirt dress,


Verdict: Another great dress for uniboobers and flatties alike. Assymetrical pattern plus double breast pockets. There are darts but these do not create too much gathering due to the crepe fabric.

Khaki green wrap front pocket blouse,

Verdict: Great blouse in a light fabric with deep collar, gathered crossover front and pleated double breast pockets. Perfect for a flat chest and a buddha belly!

Mink pussybow wrap blouse,

Verdict: Another perfect top with crossover front, pleated shoulders and pussybow detail.

Blue pleat layer sleeveless shell shirt,   

Verdict: Considering this blouse has bust darts, it hangs quite well on a flat chest. The pleat down the frontadds volume, and the assymetrical layers make this perfect for uniboobers.

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